Lesson numer one … babies don’t make sense. Among my relatives with whom we visited in Kansas were my two second cousins, aged three months and eight months. The three-month-old … no problem. She let me hold her and made happy baby noises until she got hungry … at which point I promptly handed her off to her mother ’cause I sure couldn’t give her what she wanted. The eight-month-old, on the other hand, was having nothing to do with us. He’d crawl up to me and at one point even gummed my legs but under no circumstances was I able to pick him up. But he was cute so I told him that girls really don’t like boys who drool. He agreed to work on that.
Lesson number two … sun screen (ok mom, I can see you shaking your head and sighing at me) . I’m 31 years and two days old and still I’m not smart enough to cover my bases. We travelled today to Kansas City, MO, to watch the Kansas City Royals (worst team in baseball) play the Pittsburgh Pirates (worst team in the National League). It was raining quite hard when we got there so we wore our raincoats and took our umbrellas and waited through the half-hour game delay. Unfortunately, as has been demonstrated so many times on scales both large and small, if you think you’ve got nature figured out, nature will kick your ass. So the clouds started clearing, the temperature went up about 15 degrees, and then the sun came out and we baked. Fortunately, my face and arms have been somewhat exposed to the sun so got only a little pinker today. Unfortunately, my formerly pasty knees are approximately the same shade as boiled lobster. Ah well, even given the pain I am in right now, it was a good day for bad baseball. It’s is a sad thing when one team (the Pirates) scored seven times and still lost by eight runs and when the fans are booing the winning home team, even though all but one player scored. On a few other notes, Kaufman stadium is ridiculously hard to find despite being right off of two major highways. They managed to ruin funnel cakes (which is really hard given that it is fried dough and powdered sugar) and no one sang “Take Me Out to the Ballgame.”
Lesson number three … indoor voices. We went to dinner tonight at a Mexican restaurant. Unfortunately, a large party was also there. Double-plus-unfortunately, they were loud, high-pitched, and fueled by alcohol. I suspect that the world would be a better place if I were more tolerant of others (also if I were a less fussy eater, but that’s a whole different problem) but then I wouldn’t be the happy-go-lucky jaded cynic that you all know and love. Seriously, though, do we all need to share when one young lady shows off her tatoos and navel ring? I THINK NOT!
Enough with the morality tales. Some random thoughts … We’re having a grand time on our trip. We hit the westernmost point of our trip yesterday in Lindsborg, KS. We’ve also gone more than 3000 miles as of this morning and we still have nine days. We have to go to Abilene, KS, on our next trip for in what other city can you visit the Eisenhower presidential library, the fashion museum, the museum of independent telephony, AND the greyhound hall of fame? The grass on the tallgrass prarie doesn’t really get tall until August. The sausage races in Milwaukee are brilliant. My name is Lisa Mather and I’m addicted to ice cream.
Enough for me tonight. Hope all are well. We’ll see you soon!