I’m Noticing a Trend of Procrastination

After starting with the good news yesterday, today in Diabetes Blog Week we look at the flip-side: What could be better? What could we start doing today to make it better?

Friends, I am very good at spotting possible trends in my BG readings. Yesterday, I reported how morning swims are almost always amazingly consistent BG experiences. I have also noticed that I go up most afternoons around 2:00 and then drop a bunch during my afternoon workouts. I’m observant enough to have seen that evenings are higher than mornings. And I believe that I fall slowly overnight before going back up a bit before dawn. Some of these trends are good, others less so, and some just are what they are.

(Recently I’ve also been noticing more trends like the one shown below: awesome trend lines reported by my CGM. That 7:00 bolus there is for pizza, my friends. Half of a large pizza.)

What I’m not good at doing is acting on those hunches. When I suspect a pattern, I could should make detailed observations, adjust a few things, and test whether that made it better. But I don’t. Well, I do, but it takes longer than it should. (I also forget to write down the awesome things that worked, and I sometimes have to start over from scratch.)

“Why?” you might ask.

I believe some might call it “procrastination.”

“But that’s not a reason,” you say. “It’s likely just an effect of some kind of disordered thinking. Why not make the changes?”

Because, my dear friends, it’s hard to make changes to something that (mostly) works, that keeps away the lows and lets me exercise when I want with (mostly) good results. Because it’s hard to fiddle around and possibly make things worse. Because starting to make changes like that requires an active commitment to start, and I just haven’t carved out the time to do the basal testing (again!) or kept up with my BG+food+exercise journaling. Because, despite having done my NPH exorcism almost two years ago, that fear of the lows is still very much with me, and getting closer to the good place means getting closer to the edge of hypo more often. (At least I tell myself that, even though I’m not convinced it’s true.)

But today is a new day, and it’s the day I can stop procrastinating on these trends.

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